Responsibility "Gene"

Why are certain people able to set clear boundaries and only take on the duties, tasks, and burdens that are truly theirs, while others feel compelled to step in and make sure things "turn out right?"

Is the latter a case of overresponsibility and what are the consequences of such actions? Are these people ripe for manipulation by those looking to move some responsibility off of their own plates? The latter often commit to performing a task and then blatantly ignore it. Are they just ambitious overreachers who we should cut slack since they have the big vision, or are they trading in the plaudits that come with signing up, knowing that when the rubber meets the road, one of those overresponsible types will jump into the breach to help them?

Can you stand by and watch something important you are associated with (like a presentation, a client meeting, or a planned family event) come to a disastorous end because the person responsible did not do his or her job? I have trouble not pitching in to make it better. Am I a team player, an enabler, or someone who likes the role of martyr? These are questions I have to ask myself.

I would appreciate any feedback, as I currently have run into this dilemma several times in the past couple of months. I do know that such overresponsible behavior seems to carry with it a simmering resentment, at least for me, that can't really be good for me or those I work with.

Meeting the Grandson

I got to meet my grandson, Conall Broderick, in late February, 2007. It had been a long time since I had held a baby, so (as you can see) I am a little nervous.

The most amazing part of the trip was watching my daughter and her husband as they cared for their son. I admit to grave doubts about them having a child: they were awfully young themselves, and not very settled in careers or even their marriage. But they sure seemed to take to it well. I was amazed at how casually my daughter dealt with the responsibility. Not casual as in lacksidasical, but casual as in relaxed and competent.

So another life starts. I know that he will hit all of the milestones and some will be joyful and some will be trying (lost innocence is still hard to take). I am trying not to invest too much in my hopes, and make room for his dreams as they form. I am curious as to what he will teach me. I can hardly wait!

Welcome to the funhouse, Conall. It is quite a ride.

Remembering Kurt Vonnegut

OK, so he is not dead, but I am remembering first finding out about Kurt Vonnegut. I am reminded because I just read A Man Without a Country, his 2005 semi-memoirs, semi-rant, semi-autobiography.

Like almost everything by Vonnegut, it is worth the read, and this volume is so slim that your wisdom returned/time invested ratio is very high. It is in paperback and not very expensive (compared to gasoline).

http://www.sevenstories.com/Book/index.cfm?GCOI=58322100189510

Now I am thinking about how my college roommate David introduced me to Breakfast of Champions, and we both wanted to know more about Kilgore Trout, so Venus on the Halfshell was next. Next up was our friend Mike who shared his copy of Cat's Cradle, and the world of Bokkonon and Ice-Nine was opened. And, much later, I find out that Kevin had an epiphany reading Slaughterhouse-Five. and may actually believe he is Billy Pilgrim.

Vonnegut should be just that - a shared discovery. I came to Ellison and Mailer and Kesey and Bellow through the tradtional channels (literature courses in college), but Vonnegut! He ought to be something you get from your friends, like dope or the girl's name in your psych class that you want to meet (shout out to Susan C.).

So, I give it a ten - you can really dance to it!